​Happy New Year!

...Happy February!

New year's goals are kind of my jam... actually I always sort of liked September ('new school year') goals, but over the last couple years I have had my intentions ready and written for the year ahead January 1st.

And then this year happened...
My intentions were not ready.
My intentions did not get written.

Well, I did write them down... gradually... through the month in scattered notes... but not all in one place, looking pretty like I usually do after I've already written and edited them for the second or third time.

This year was a slower start for me. Hard to believe really! I didn't and don't even feel the desire to publish my goals over the internet or social media. I just kept my list quiet and growing as ideas popped in to my head.

Truthfully, much of my list hasn't changed from last year. But my vibe towards my goals has changed. Last year, this time, I was so (literally) full of new life! I had this big ready-to-make-things-happen energy surrounding my goals that I just don't have this year.

Honestly, it's helped me weed out what I don't want and get clear on what I do, going forward. I'm feeling really peaceful and accepting of my conclusion to change my mind about some things I used to want to do because I simply don't want to do them anymore.

And even though I don't feel that same overall motivation, that clarity has been everything! It's the clarity rather than that life force that I need because with the clarity I will better find and use the energy needed to pursue the goals I truly want!

​I hope typing that helps someone to have a light bulb moment. Or gives you an opportunity to reflect and become clear on what you want for the year ahead.

And maybe that looks like letting go of old goals, old relationships, old shoulda-coulda-wouldas and following your own damn path to what you truly want!

That's the kind of energy and kind of writing I'm bringing to the blog this year!

I'm still sticking with my format of "happy", "new" and "year" goals that I wrote about in this post last year. It's where I break down my list of intentions in to things that make me happy, new things to try and goals I want to accomplish in 2019. It's been a fun and helpful way of doing things!

I'll also be creating ongoing intentions throughout the year. Last year was monthly. This year may be more seasonal or following the moon cycles. Yep, moon cycles. If you haven't already discovered moon manifesting magic, I challenge you to check it out. Even if it sounds completely crazy, increasing your mindfulness about the potential (I'll save deets for another post) energy surrounding nature's cycles is seriously worth it. I spent last year writing personal, just for me, intentions nearly every full and new moon and what came to be and what patterns cycled round was fascinating!

Ok! So! However your New Year began, wherever you find yourself reading this post. Just start.

When you close this, take a big breath, find a quiet moment,  reflect and dream up those intentions for the months to come in 2019.

What happy new things will you pursue this year?

…

What will you "chase"?
What will you "choose"?
What will you "cherish"?

I'll be bringing you more on the idea of those words and what they mean to myself and some other inspiring souls soon ;)

2019, I'm ready for you!
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The holiday season is well on it’s way! I think I’m more on the ball with Christmas shopping than ever and it’s still November. Which brings me to, it’s still November! Which means it’s still Fall.

Is it just me or does hype for everything start a little earlier each year?!

It seems everyone is ready to jump in to Fall early August, with over a month left of actual Summer season. Then everyone is ready for Christmas as soon as Halloween ends. It’s great to look forward to things, I’m certainly getting in to the holiday spirit, but I think it takes away from the present moment. We’re so busy worried about what’s next that we’re done with what IS while it’s happening!

So, even though the land of Instagram is moving on from pumpkin errrythang,. I'm playing catch up on all our Fall festive fun!

At the end of August I took a social media break. Partly to be more present for those present moments. To soak up the transitions of my girls starting school and unplug from everyone else’s “noise.”

It was honestly freeing. Part of me didn’t even want to plug back in... but social media is a blessing in many other ways to plug in to the things we *want* to plug in to! So here I am, back again.

Some of you might appreciate a catch up on snippets of the fun we were up to during that time. And it’s helpful for me to journal some of our happenings to document that season and welcome what’s next!
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Halle started Kindergarten! Our school’s program is only half day and she goes in the afternoon. It’s been a big change for her but she loves it. I can’t believe how much she has grown in just a couple months!

Autumn also started Preschool this year before going to Kinder next year. She is going two afternoons a week and loves it!

This gives me a (super quick) window of time to spend one on one with Jordan or sometimes a day date with Matthew, when he’s off. The girls miss having “built in” friends everyday like they did with my dayhome so they enjoy socializing at school. And this time is much appreciated by me to get things done or simply relax.
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My sister came to visit us during September. This was her first time meeting Jordan. It was great to have her here while Matthew was away to help me with the transition in to school drop offs. It’s a lot of going and I haven’t had to experience that yet...

It was great to simply catch up and we took in some sights around the city! Although early Fall was much colder than as of late. We went to Granary Road and the Calgary Corn Maze.
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Next up was Autumn and Matthew’s birthdays! Year 4 and 30! Autumn hosted her first big kid birthday party at our house. We had some animal activities, old school party games and a glow dance party - cause who doesn’t love that! For Matthew’s, a crowd of us went to a Calgary Hitmen game.

My dad was able to make a quick weekend visit then too! We always enjoy any time we can spend with grandparents.
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October brought us more visits to the Corn Maze. And, luckily, more sunshine too! We love spending the afternoons there. We love the mini doughnuts too ;)

Surprisingly, this was our first year actually carving pumpkins with the kids. Other years we’ve just used them as decor or painted and decorated them. It was fun to do this together this year. And I loved having the pumpkin seeds to roast and add to oatmeal and salads :)
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This Fall Autumn is taking ballet and Halle joined Sparks. Halle really enjoyed her day camp in October! We made an adventure out of that day by heading to the mountains to hike Johnston Canyon.

Halloween was a lot of fun this year! The girls both had parties at school and it’s always special to celebrate another baby’s “first.” The weather was great for trick or treating and the girls went farther than ever before! We also started a new tradition of having a campfire in our driveway. I handed out treats there and hung out with neighbours and friends. It was better than driving our dogs bonkers and juggling a baby back and forth to the door.
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In other Fall news, the season brought lots of fresh air fun and times spent as a family and with friends. The girls and I also joined a mommy group and have enjoyed connecting with new families through school.

As shared in my last post, I still have big dreams for this space. While sometimes I think I talk a big talk (and don’t take that action) it comes down to a priority struggle for me sometimes. After all, the time being present and the times you see in those photos is what it’s all about. If I can swing doing extra on the side to make my soul happy then that’s just icing on the cake!

One thing I did change up, in a surprising way, was jump back in to designing Keep Collective. There’s a lot more I’d like to share about this but for now it’s just something fun for me! A way to be creative, design reminders of what matters most and help spread some happy with others. And I’ve got big plans on how I want to weave all my dreams together and be more fearless when it comes to doing the things I want that bring me joy!

In saying that, I hope these photos spread some joy to you. I hope Fall was filled with many happy memories for you and yours. I hope you took time to unplug and be present. And, if you didn’t, try it this season. It will be even better during the “most wonderful time of the year!”

Thanks, as always, for reading and following along with our growing family! XO

​When I was pregnant with Jordan I became so clear on what I wanted for my future. As I was growing my baby I was growing myself. I was preparing for a rebirth of sorts. It was as though I was unlocking my true self. Clear on who I was in the moment, in my role as mama, but also ready to live out my dreams that extend beyond motherhood. I was consistently journaling, pushing my comfort zone and manifesting baby steps towards the things I wanted in life. It was really cool.

Then Jordan was born. His birth gave me an overwhelming joy and peace towards this new chapter. I was ready. I was confident in my mama skills and determined to "make best use" of my maternity time... that is to say, this was 'my chance!' The time when I'm not working a formal job and plan to turn my hobbies and passions in to something more.

To write more and grow this blog...

To share my favourite wellness tools...

To create community for mamas...

To inspire others to design a life they love...

The list goes on. In fact I have a whole journal full of ideas to prove it.

But then it hit me. Not in an I'm-being-hard -on-myself kinda way, cause we all know mothering ain't easy... Especially with a newborn, two big sisters, two big dogs, family away, LIFE...

It was overwhelm, anxiety, sadness, rage...

Like a failure in one of my biggest roles: mama.

I was so clear on my hopes, but I felt oh so lost.

Days became one at a time, seeking joy in the little moments and trying to simply focus on my kids.

I thought maybe this is the season to just be there for them. If I get better at being the mom I "used to be," (the confident, calm one,) then maybe I would find my groove again and get back to my goals. Or, maybe just really love on my kids and put my dreams aside.

And, don't get me wrong, the last five months (yep, he's 5 months!) have been filled with so many wonderful moments and memories. And I know there's no such thing as the mom I used to be - it's still me! - but that's how it's felt. I'm pushing the guilt down as I type because deep down I know I'm an awesome mom. (See THIS post <3) I know the fun we've had and I know these times, easy and hard, were ALL worth it. I know now these moments are just the past... and the future is bright.

But what happened in the last few months was me losing the habits that had lead me to be that higher version of myself.

My exercising slowed down. My eating wasn't as healthy. I stopped using my oils and supplements consistently. My journal wasn't being filled nearly as often. I simply didn't make the time for the things that helped me feel my best. And on top of it, was doubting my skills as a mama, the thing that has been my biggest role in the last five years...

How could I be the best version of me?

I know what you'll say. If you're reading this, chances are you're telling me it's okay. You might say you're doing great - you have a new baby!  Your kids are what's important right now.

You, my friend, are very kind.

But would you be as kind to yourself?

Would you give YOURSELF that grace?